TRANSFORMING YOUR LIFE. LITTLE CHANGES MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE
“The order or disorder of my surroundings is directly proportionate to my state of mind. Visual and physical clutter is the external manifestation of my internal clutter.”
One of the greatest gifts I’ve ever given myself was tidying up and organizing my home. No matter where I lived it seemed there was never a sense of order which, for me, meant no sense of peace or calm.
Initially, it was the entire place. It was a mess. It isolated me and I never opened my home to friends because I was ashamed. God forbid someone showed up unannounced “Sorry about the mess! I’m right in the middle of purging and reorganizing the whole place!” I’d smile and lie while cringing inside. Even when I finally managed to straighten the common areas, there was always a section, a room, that was jam packed with junk, unpacked boxes, clothes; cupboards and closets that oozed forth their jumbled contents whenever I dared open the door. It was stressful, and because I couldn’t lay my hands on anything, a massive time thief.
Long before I'd ever heard of "Sparking Joy", I made the decision to face the overwhelming task and address it once and for all. There is a lot of emotional energy tangled up in that mess and to move it is to unleash it. Doing so was greatly upsetting and often made me feel sick to my stomach. I knew it was going to take several weeks or more to tackle it all but it had to be done.
I’d pick a day, shore myself up mentally, open the windows wide, and attack. I did it piece by piece, section by section, room by room. I made piles: trash, donate, sell, keep. Once I lay my hands on something, I would only allow myself to set it down in one of the four piles. If I didn’t love it or truly need it I let it go (this often required some serious tough self-love: “C’mon, Amie, just face it. You are never, EVER going to use that pasta maker.”) And there was no room for “but this belonged to so and so” or “Whosiwhatsis gave it to me!” I was no longer in the business of being an emotional storage unit. For clothing, it had to meet all three of the following criteria: it had to “flatter the wearer”; aka make me look and feel like a million bucks, be age appropriate (just because I can doesn’t mean I ought to!) and have no tears, stains, or wear, otherwise it was gone.
When I was done sorting, the items I wanted to sell went on Craig’s List that same day and the garbage and giveaways were taken out of the house immediately. The trash went to the curb or straight to the dump and all donations went directly to the car to be dropped that day or as soon as the place was open. I had one hard rule: once it was out of the house it didn’t come back.
Then, I’d clean the area top to bottom. The more I had gotten rid of the easier it was to put away and organize what was left.
It was a huge job but once it was done, I felt amazing. For days afterward, I would keep going back to the newly cleaned area to gaze upon and admire my work. I started keeping my car clean, too. How different this all made me feel!! Oprah Winfrey (or maybe it was Nate Burkus on the Oprah Show?) once said “Your home should rise up to meet you.” This is so true! Few things feel better to me than waking up in or coming home to a tidy space. It shows respect for my belongings, my home, and myself.
How do you feel about keeping you home in order? Have you done it? Do you hope to? Or do you like your crap just the way it is, thank you very much!
Please comment below. I'd love to hear your thoughts and experience! Maybe you have a source of inspiration you'd like to share?
Marie Kondo has Sparked me some serious Joy!! https://konmari.com/
Six words: Nate Burkus, Oprah Winfrey, 'Nuff Said: http://www.oprah.com/home/take-nate-berkus-home-with-you_1
No one can hold you prisoner for the mistakes of your past without guarding the gate and keeping track of the key. The inmate and the warden are trapped in the jail together.
If there are people in your life that refuse to support or recognize your growth, it may be time to let them go, or at least keep them at arm’s length. Their inability to move on isn’t about you it’s about them. They cannot recognize in others what they are unable to accomplish themselves. If they are determined to try and shame you, it is due to their own shame. If they keep bringing up your past, it is because that is where they live. People who feel good about themselves don’t try to make others feel bad. The trap, however, only exists in their mind. Wish them well and leave them to it. To free yourself, you only need to walk away.